


Mom, I'm tired

by EdDies



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, Childhood, Childhood Memories, Growing Up, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:47:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28166481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EdDies/pseuds/EdDies
Summary: The hands massaging my head were still soft and gentle. My light blond hair was darkened by the water and fell heavy onto my sunburnt shoulders. You always liked my hair long. I always bent my neck so far back it hurt. Would you laugh if I told you that I am still as scared of getting shampoo in my eyes?vent-inspired by Class of 2013 by Mitski
Kudos: 1





	Mom, I'm tired

The light shone in through the small bathroom window and painted the blue walls and floors with iridescent warmth. Droplets of warm water ran down your forearms, catching onto your light grey sleeves and dampening your shirt. Your brown hair was caught in a ponytail though some strands had escaped and fell down into your face. The wrinkles on your face weren't as deep set as they were the last time I saw your face, yet to be brought out by the stress. I wish I wasn’t the cause of so much of it.

The hands massaging my head were still soft and gentle. My light blond hair was darkened by the water and fell heavy onto my sunburnt shoulders. You always liked my hair long. I always bent my neck so far back it hurt. Would you laugh if I told you that I am still as scared of getting shampoo in my eyes?

The water was warm and my heart was light. You rubbed my soapy shoulders, you always complemented how beautiful my body was. I’m sorry I tainted it. I wish I could be better for you. My worth is continuously dropping in value. With each C and every hour spent in my bed. Did you know that my back is aching? I tried to ask you for a massage but I was too tired to give one first. It is getting harder to sleep at night. Would you help me if you knew?

With each disappointed look you give me I get more tired. The want of diving into an endless slumber is getting harder to ignore. I’m sorry I haven’t told you. But I am scared that you will laugh once again. We sat on our grey couch. You held me in your arms as I cried. The warmth of your skinny body comforted the pile of rocks in my chest. The scratchy fabric of your tunic made my cheek ache and my eyes stung. I was small in your presence, yet you laughed. You forced the pile of rocks further into my lungs. And I will never forget your amused voice as you spoke.

The rocks have caused my throat to swell and you ask me why I’m so quiet. Whatever I say isn’t important, please don’t listen to me.  
I think I’m gonna go to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> no, my mom is not dead  
> I wrote this while listening to Class of 2013 repetedly and crying.  
> Although this was only fueled by my intense emotions I may write more in the future.  
> Please know that English is not my first language so if there are any grammar mistakes please tell me.
> 
> /Eddie


End file.
